I reread this story recently. “When Rabbi Zusya grew old and knew that his time on earth was nearing a close, his students gathered around him. One of them asked him if [the rabbi] was afraid of dying. ‘I am afraid of what God will ask me,’ the Rabbi said. ‘What will he ask you?’ ‘He will not ask me, ‘Zusya, why were you not like Moses?’ He will ask me, ‘Zusya, why were you not Zusya?’”
We have often heard or seen, WWJD - What Would Jesus Do. It’s been around for quite a while. In light of what the Rabbi is afraid might be asked of him by God, I wonder if we are asking the wrong question. I wonder if the question goes something like this: In this decision that I am pondering, what would be the fullest expression of who I am? It’s a long and deep question, but maybe one worth considering.
Maybe when we are wondering what is the best decision to make, we might need to take the journey within to see what’s really there and to see who we truly are. Shouldn’t our choice, our decision, come from a place of authenticity? Shouldn’t what we ultimately decide be rooted in our identity? After all, might that be what God really wants of us?
What would the real Mark do in this situation? What gifts are being called out from Mark in this situation? How might Mark bring more of Mark into the world with this decision? These may sound selfish, but they are not. They are real questions that come from my core, the place where God dwells. Wouldn’t that be an awesome place to visit for an answer when we are trying to make a decision?
I sometimes do wonder if God might ask me, “Mark, why did you let fear hold Mark back?” “Why did you not let Mark be more of Mark?” To think that each and everyone of us has been gifted with grace, goodness and light that is meant to be brought forth into this world! All of us, men and women, have the ability to birth new light and life into our world that needs it! Think of all the potential that gets buried in our cemeteries for so many different reasons!
Wouldn’t it be great to go to God at the end of our lives with empty hands stretched out and say, “I used every ounce of ME that you gave me, God.”